Johno 

JOKE The Patient and the Nurse

>A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over
> his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult, four
> hour,surgical procedure. A young, student nurse appears to give him a
> partial sponge bath.
>
> "Nurse," he mumbles, from behind the mask. "Are my tes*ticles black?"
>
> Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir, I'm only here to
> wash your upper body and feet."
>
> He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, are my tes*ticles black?"
>
> Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his tes*ticles,
> she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers.
>
> She raises his gown, holds his pe*nis in one hand and his tes*ticles in
> the
> other, lifting and moving them around.
>
> Then, she takes a close look and says,"There's nothing wrong with them,
> Sir."
>
> The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly,
>
> "Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but, listen very, very closely
>
>
> "A r e -- m y -- t e s t -- r e s u l t s -- b a c k?"
>
>

Introducing a New Book Club Experience

 

Motown Month: On-Air Specials, Vote For Your Top Track + Win Albums

 

 

NOVEMBER 01

Motown Month On Capital Gold  On-air specials including Motown Magic and Motown Greats starring Smokey Robinson, Lionel Richie + more  Vote for your favourite Motown track ahead of our Motown Countdown  Play new Beat The Intro: Motown Edition + win a Roberts DAB Digital Radio plus win Motown: Ultimate Collection and Smokey Robinson albums.

THE MAGIC OF MOTOWN

We kick off Motown Month tonight (Wednesday) from 7pm with Smokey Robinson who introduces our tribute to the world's favourite record company. Listen as Diana Ross (pictured), Martha Reeves, Jimmy Ruffin and more talk about 'The Motown Sound' and the key artists that helped to establish the label ahead of Part 2 next week. Click here for more info.

MOTOWN GREATS + MOTOWN 'HITSVILLE USA'

We celebrate the music of two of Motown's finests - Smokey Robinson (pictured) and Lionel Richie who talk to David Jensen about their careers plus Soul Spectrum  host Greg Edwards looks at four key Motown hits and how they've been interpreted over the years. Find out more.

MOTOWN COUNTDOWN - SUNDAY NOVEMBER 26

Throughout Motown Month, we're asking you to vote for your favourite Motown track, be it a worldwide smash hit single or a album track gem. Tune in as we compile your nominations and play out the most popular 100 songs as voted by you. See how Capital Gold HQ have voted then send us your nomination.

PLAY BEAT THE INTRO: MOTOWN EDITION

Celebrate the legendary label's legacy with the latest edition of our online game - identify the tracks taken from our 'Motown: The Ultimate Collection' album just from the opening bars for the chance to walk away with a Roberts DAB Digital Radio. Click here to play .

WIN 'MOTOWN: THE ULTIMATE COLLECTION' ALBUMS

Marvin Gaye, Diana Ross, The Jackson 5, Stevie Wonder , Smokey Robinson, The Four Tops and more come together for a brilliant 3-disc album that celebrates Motown's musical legacy. Find out more about Capital Gold's latest 3-disc album plus enter the competition to win a copy.

WIN SMOKEY ROBINSON ALBUMS

If that wasn't enough, we've also got Smokey Robinson's latest album up for grabs. A special two-album release, enjoy a definitive collection of Smokey's greatest hits ahead of second album 'Timeless Love' where Smokey puts his velvet touch on romantic jazz, big band and traditional pop standards of the '20s, '30s and '40s. Click here to enter the competition.

SOUL SPECTRUM: FRIDAYS FROM 7PM; SATURDAYS FROM  6PM Join Greg Edwards for three hours of the finest soul, funk and disco cuts

Aussie Toilet Paper Ad

All,

We've all seen those ads for toilet paper. Well here is the Aussie version
!

http://members.ozemail.com.au/~athatecj/Stuff/AussieToiletPaperAd.wmv
>
> This Windows Media Video (WMV) clip with sound is kinda big (2.2MB) to
> send out as an attachment especially for Dial-up users so I've being
> considerate and temporarily placed it off my homepage site for all you to
> see/hear and also for those who are stuck with Proxy server connections at
> work or in a Netcafe which only allow HTTP (WWW/Port 80) Internetwork
> traffic throughput only.
>
> This will give you a chance to save it if you so like it. I'll leave it up
> a week or so for you all to see/save it.
>
> Alternatively, you can click on my shortcut directory link of
> http://members.ozemail.com.au/~athatecj/Stuff/ & pick the file you want by
> "Right Click - Save Target" to anywhere you like.
>
> Click the link below and wait a while (say 10, 15mins on dial-up!) for it
> to download and play it in something like Media Player/MPlayer (Linux/UN
> IX/MacOS) etc.
>
> If it doesn't work well the 1st time, try and play it again as it should
> play from the buffered files on your PC or give me a holler as I might be
> able to assist.
>
> Usual issues I've encountered is unable to display the file due to a
> CODEC. If Media Player prompts you, go online & download/install the codec
> or let me know and I'll see if I can source some but let me know what
> version of media player you're running.
>
> Enjoy,
>
> /Johnno :-)